Monday Night

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what went on in my life last Friday and how it effected me personally. I’ve also been thinking a lot about how I could have been perceived by others. It’s not up to me to judge how someone makes a live mind you. There are lots of ways to do it; both legal and illegal. But we’re not talking about others since I was the one that brought up talking about me.

I spent a good part of my time earlier today walking my yard to inspect it with the snow and ice rapidly melting and to also pick up the crap that accumulated since last November. What I was asking myself was whether or not I was a “job snob” since I moved from a very well paid Government position to a retail position. Did I view myself or come across to others as being too good to work in a position like that? What finally settled it all in my head was you have to know what you are worth versus what you are getting paid or what conditions that you have to work under. Let me explain.

A few in the VA made my life extremely miserable over the course of three years. They were overly critical, quick to point fingers at me, quick to lay blame and quick to point out my faults. They hardly ever spoke to how I mentored others and/or demanded that they perform at a professional level that I knew that they were capable of. I was constantly challenging them to be better than they felt that they were and then pointed out just what they accomplished by themselves when coaxed or prodded in the right manner. At the end of the day, my mental health was worth far more than the paycheck and living miserable was no way to live. It was time to pop smoke and pull the eject handle and get out of there. I knew what I was worth and I knew that they would never give it to me. I’ll pay myself if they will never ever pay me for what I’m worth. And mind you, pay can be more than just money. A simple Thank You is even pay.

Regarding my last venture, it poses a different view. This was supposed to be my fun job after retiring from Government service. It was too until the heat was turned on. Management liked to say that the $19.00 per hour that they were paying me was a lot of money. Well, it’s not. Now you want to subject me to people ganging up on me and managers doing Monday Morning Quarterbacking on me? Yo! Guess what? My pay rate demand just doubled if you want me to tolerate that but let’s face the reality that one isn’t going to get $38.00 per hour working retail now are they? But another reality is that they are used to employing people that need the job and someone who won’t tolerate their games is now an impediment and is deemed expendable. Yeh. No one has come crawling to me begging me to come back. Whereas I’ll smile and say “Sure! Whatever you want.” at $38.00 per hour, I won’t do it for $19.00 per hour.

Come on. Even I have standards. What are you willing to sell your soul for and then look at yourself in a mirror?