5 Reasons why I hate the dreaded Minnesota Wingless Tree Dragons


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1. They steal my nuts.  Yes, I put out a mixed blend of bird seed, fruit and peanuts for the birdies and these lil’ monsters like to come and eat up my nuts.

2. They have no respect. I open the door and yell at them whenever I catch them eating at the bird feeder and they have the audacity to give me the “Oh yeh?  F**k you!” look.  I think they learned this attitude from some Chicago wise guys.

3.  They are stealthy lil’ shits.  They sneak up on you behind your back and the next thing you know they’re busy chomping away on my nuts.  I think they learned some ninja skills from Jason.  I blame Gary for letting him teach them.

4. I’ve caught them staring at me thru my patio door with the look of “Did you know your bird feeder is empty?

5. They take their sweet ass time running away whenever I do eventually run them off.  Then they have the audacity to sit at a distance and flick their bushy lil’ tails with their Terminator attitude of “I’ll be back.”

I can’t win.

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57 thoughts on “5 Reasons why I hate the dreaded Minnesota Wingless Tree Dragons

  1. Gray squirrels, it turns out, are imports to the U.K. from America (possibly the U.S., possibly Canada–I have no idea), and they’re said to be squeezing out the native red squirrels. I have equally little idea if they’re really doing that or if it’s just the gossip that’s making the rounds.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. portapatetcormagis

    Hey, they’re fluffy and they’re cute. And they suffer enough from that horrible name you call them! Squirrel is one of the most difficult English words, poor little buggers!

    Just give them their own food. And make sure to label the feeders, so they know 😉

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  3. I have a red squirrel causing trouble on my front step. The dog goes out to the field, finds the corn the picker missed, drags them onto my front step, I put them in a bucket (I have a full bushel now), the squirrel comes, eats on the corn (I’ve put a lid on it now), when I open the door, said red runs up the side of my red brick schoolhouse and LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKS at me like ‘HEY! YOU INTERRUPTED MY MEAL!!’ I’d shoot him myself but shot gun shells make a bigger mess than the squirrel.

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  4. I laugh because I know the struggle. One made me so mad this past spring, I got my little 22 pistol and stood on the porch and shot at him. Of course I missed but it did scare the Crap out if him. Which made me laugh. And the next time I went out all I had to do was clap my hands at him and he ran. We even keep field corn on a stand for them in the backyard. I call them tree rats because they look like rats and I believe are of the same family. I have gotten some great photos of them and their acrobatics in hanging on a branch and trying to reach the feeder. We use sunflower seeds. No nuts. 😉

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    1. the bird seed mix has sunflowers seeds too which my cardinals, finches, sparrows and chickadees love. I’d use my 22 but I think my cop neighbor would object.

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      1. Yeah, they’re no fun like that. We live outside of city limits. No leash laws (which annoys me) and no gun control. I probably would have felt bad if I hit him or a bird. We get finches, cardinals, blue jays, woodpeckers, and some smaller birds. I think there are chickadees in there two. I haven’t identified them all.

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  5. well, they are squirrels. They are quite squirrely. And they eat nuts? At least they aren’t rats. We had a bird feeder on the balcony of our condo – the dog would bark at what we thought were random things… but then we’d find little turd droppings – ugh RATS, we’ve got rats. They are coming for the food. My husband had to hang the bird feede off the side of the kitchen window – the roof tiles were spanish tiles and too slippery for those buggers. And it wasn’t near anything they could get on.

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  6. Hilarious! I see that you have red squirrels up there in Minnesota. We have gray squirrels down here and they are twice the size of your red squirrels. As I am always trying to fatten up the birds in my neighborhood… mmmmm birds… these gigantic toothy tree beavers are definitely a nuisance. One thing I know about squirrels is they don’t like chicken hawks and bug zappers… think it over… 👍👍🙈
    ^^Iggy (amateur Animal control officer currently working toward my online degree at ITT Tech)
    P.S. I must add that I enjoy a squirrel with a delicious nutty nougat filling…👍
    ^^ Buffalo Tom (connoisseur of nutty squirrels)

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      1. LOL! ITT Tech is the for-profit college that recently went out of business due to the huge number of lawsuits filed against them by former students who were ripped off by the school which was scamming them and the Student Loan program. But don’t worry Donald Trump’s education secretary, Betsy DeVos, has Frozen all of those lawsuits against ITT Tech and other crooked for-profit colleges and will prosecute student loan debt holders who received bogus diplomas from these corporate colleges. This is the Republican party at work. Shame Shame Shame

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      2. well I’m sure that they only have the best interests of distinguished alumni such as yourself. that and maybe they hold shares or interests with it as well. and it explains why I haven’t seen their commercials on the TV whenever I watch Jerry Springer.

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      3. Hahaha! Buffalo Tom gets all of his degrees from ITT Tech but the only place he can practice medicine with his ITT Tech diploma… is Russia! Imagine that! But there’s hope. After Donald Trump resigns and Mike Pence becomes president… our ITT Tech diplomas will ALSO be accepted in Syria! 👍👍

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      4. yeh, that was planted in a special valise from Moscow that was given to Hillary’s staff … or so I heard. it doesn’t matter. El Presidente rules by decree now.

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  7. A Perfectmindstorm

    I put my bird feeder on a metal pole, those kind people hang plants on sometimes. Then I wrapped a slinky around the pole and no more squirrel problems. I am kind though so I do throw a bit of food on the ground for the squirrels.
    I’m sorry they steal your nuts. That must be weird not having any nuts 😉 I don’t have nuts though and I do okay without them 😀

    Liked by 2 people

      1. A Perfectmindstorm

        Here is a really cool squirrel proof feeder. Too much for me to try to do, but you are handy with tools, you could probably build it . Hope that link works. Never tried to post a link on here. They might kick me for doing that…

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  8. I’m with you on this one. No matter where you put the feeder, they still, somehow get to it. I did slow them down a little by putting out peanuts, still in the shell. They love them, plus you’re making the little devils work for their meal.

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    1. I’ve seen people do the slinky thing on a pole and that’s funny. then I’ve seen a guy put some aluminum downspout around the pole. they can’t get a grip on it to climb.

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