5 Reasons I Hate Diet & Exercise


Let’s give this a go:

1. One word “doughnuts”.  Yeh.  You’re not suppose to have them.  Oh they’ll say that you can have them in “moderation“.  WTH is moderation?  “Moderation” to me is one for each hand.

2. Two words “ice cream”.  Oh yeh!  I love it and especially the good stuff.  and let’s not forget the caramel sauce, strawberry topping and hot fudge to top it off.  Oh yeh, whip cream too.  You can have that no more either.  They say “You can have it in moderation.”  There’s that damn “moderation” word again.

3.  I hate when I now look in the mirror now and think “Ewww!” whereas before I used to think “What a hunka hunka burning love.”  Why do I suspect Jason put Gary up to getting my mirror to lie to me now???

4.  My scale still lies to me as well.  I’ve been putting in 15,000 to 20,000 steps daily, watching what I eat and drinking that 64 ounces of water every day.  I’m still stuck on that one number that keeps popping up on my scale.  I think the SOB is broke … or it will be if I keep seeing that number for much longer.  Oh yeh.  As for that water, my skin may be clearer but damn I gotta go to the bathroom a lot.

5. I had some delirious delusion that I could compete on “Survivor” and really kick ass once I got back in better shape.  Yeh, I’d compete on “Survivor“.  It would be “Survivor Ritz Cracker“.  Don’t get in the way of a food challenge right now.  I’d bite your hands, legs, butts, whatever if you got in the way of me and a pizza.  I can hear ya now.  “Oh Jim.  You can have pizza but have it in moderation.”  There’s that damn “moderation” word again.

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43 thoughts on “5 Reasons I Hate Diet & Exercise

  1. portapatetcormagis

    I know you can do it and you’ll soon rise to join Mr. Universe competitions!
    Do some maths and check out how many steps you need to do to make up for your donut. Then decide whether it’s worth it.
    100 sit-ups a day also help a lot 🙂

    Go, Jim, go!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. dunno. why not Captain Kangaroo too? I’ve always thought that someone would get some great TV share if they had a channel for old kid shows from the 50’s and 60’s on the tube plus a channel that ran old silent movies.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Umm…there is a place just down the street where you can get doughnut ice cream sandwiches. That’s the best of both worlds!!! My family decided to have a “cheat night” last night and I discovered that one piece of pizza has about 350-500 calories per slice. What the hell? I would have to swim 45 minutes straight to work all of that off. I ate the pizza, but now I feel like a gelatinous piece of crap because of all the water I retained from the salt I ingested in that one piece. Note to self – avoid pizza, it is not worth it!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 😂😂😂😂😂 made me giggle lol looked in the mirror last night and instead of the sexy new me I’m back to the bulgy old me with three tires to add to my trunk.
    I need to look fabulous for the ball in August lol

    Liked by 1 person

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